


Oh my fucking god, he fucking dead. (I'm so fucking sorry.)

by ANNdimout



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Ghosts, BAMF Mike, BAMF Stanley Uris, Character Turned Into a Ghost, Crazy Patrick Hockstetter, Creepy Patrick Hockstetter, Dead Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak is a Mess, Established Ben Hanscom/Beverly Marsh, Mike Hanlon Deserves Nice Things, Patrick Hockstetter is His Own Warning, Poet Ben Hanscom, Protective Billy Hargrove, Richie Tozier & Stanley Uris Are Best Friends, Stanley Uris Has a Bad Time, Stanley Uris Lives, Stanley Uris is a Good Friend, You Have Been Warned
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-02
Updated: 2021-01-11
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:40:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,905
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25024813
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ANNdimout/pseuds/ANNdimout
Summary: Trigger Warning ⚠// Rape/Non-Con Elements.Trigger Warning ⚠// AbuseTrigger Warning ⚠// Major Character DeathTrigger Warning ⚠// Graphic Depictions of ViolenceThe damned clubhouse was still a death trap, even worse than before. That makes sense though. Eddie's not sure what possessed him to stick his hand down a small crack in the floorboards and reach for a small rubber ball lost many years ago, due to the fact that he was a little shit growing up. However, when he pulled it up a rush of memories came back."Not what? Not be awesome and have fun and celebrate the magic of the paddddddddleballlll?""Okay Richie you're ten minute are up.""I can see your vagina."He smiled softly at the, placing it in Ben's hand as he watched the other resume their old positions in the clubhouse. He supposed he should too, but he wouldn't. The hammock would probably fall, creating a cave in. Which they all could die in. Also, for the simple fact that it just didn't feel right without Richie.Idk, just a little thingy I was working on, it's a big-ass work-in-progress. I'm not sure if I should finish this.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 9





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger Warning ⚠// Rape/Non-Con Elements. 
> 
> Trigger Warning ⚠// Abuse
> 
> Trigger Warning ⚠// Major Character Death 
> 
> Trigger Warning ⚠// Graphic Depictions of Violence
> 
> You will be warned multiple times.

_ June 13, 1991 _

Richie couldn't decide whether to laugh or cry the first time he caught Patrick looking at him as though he was a piece of meat. It had been while he was walking through the halls with his friends on the last day of school. He ended up making a joke that nobody paid attention to. 

He was now in the library, waiting for Ben to finish doing something, what that something was, he couldn't recall. (The losers had a buddy system. It was his week with Ben.). He allowed his head to fall on the table with a harsh,  _ thunk _ . Ben was in the non-fiction section, and he had left Richie at one of the many tables. Richie pulled out a piece of paper that he carried around with him. For fear of anyone finding it. He looked around for other people that could see it. However, there was no one of importance. 

There was just Patrick, who was facing sideways. Completely towards Richie. When he locked eyes with Patrick the other slowly licked his lips. Richie felt a small shiver run through his body. It was so uncomfortable, is this what Bev feels? When her father looked at her? 

He would have to ask her later to make sure he wasn't freaking out over nothing. He could be imagining things. He quickly ripped his eyes away from Patrick's and began to doodle. It was a relatively simple drawing. It was just two letters and a plus sign. So not even a doodle.

Richie continued with this, occasionally drawing something like an eyeball. It was never any good however. The only thing he really paid attention to was the letters. 

Then he started with the last names, Tozier-Kaspbrak, Kaspbrak-Tozier. For some reason he was more attracted to the first. It had a nice ring to it. So it was decided, when he and Eddie got married. It would be Tozier-Kaspbrak. 

Then again, he might never see Eddie again. His mom had moved him away a couple months back. The losers had received no phone calls, letters or anything. Eddie had just disappeared off the face of the earth. It really sucked. 

He stared at the paper he had doodled on. It was an old science assignment that he had gotten a 89% not his proudest grade. His mom would appreciate it to hang on the fridge.She did that with all his work. So, when she would see it. Richie knew he would have to explain that he was very gay for his bestfriend. He was not looking forward to it. 

However, Richie couldn't bring himself to erase the marks, or throw away the page. Not when it had such a hopeful message for an impossible future. 

Richie shook his head from his tangent. Looking over to where Ben was. He was currently looking at a thick book he had pulled off the shelf. 

"What's that Tozier?" Patrick was in front of his face suddenly, picking up the page before Richie could even try to fight. He just froze, a deer in headlights. 

Patrick just chuckled at the notes, there was no humor in it. It was cold and calculating. 

"Oh, Richie. R+E? Tozier-Kaspbrak? I wonder how Eddie would feel about this?" Richie didn't answer, just staring at his hands. What was he going to do? It wasn't like Eddie could find out. However Patrick could still tell his friends. They would literally kill Richie. 

"You're not going to anyone about this." He said, trying to sound tough. Patrick set the paper down. Richie groaned as he saw Ben's head snap over to him. Concern flashing in eyes. He quickly put the book back. 

"I won't, if you do something for me." 

"Like what?" Richie asked, even though he was afraid to. 

\-- 

Richie could have died, he was currently sitting in the junkyard. Hands shaking, as he waited for Patrick to come by. This was part of their deal. He would meet him here. Sat up on a cart, always with Patrick staring at him. Richie felt so uncomfortable, but if this was all he had to do he could live it. Sometimes, Patrick would rub his check. Not affectionately, just cold. Other times, before they left, he would receive a kiss on the check. 

Unluckily for Richie, Patrick's patience had run out. And when he got there he almost immediately tackled Richie. Richie tried to fight him off, but Patrick was working on pure sexual attraction. Nothing else. 

"Patrick! No!" Richie's fists beat against Patrick, his face, chest, anything he could reach. 

It didn't help however, Patrick was already ripping his pants. Richie couldn't stop himself from screaming. Richie began to tear at the others throat. This earned him a sadistic laugh. 

He felt the blood start to seep into his nails, down his hands and Patrick chokes hands letting go of Richie. 

Richie's knee jerked into Patrick's crotch, making the boy slump over. This caused Richie to be able roll from underneath him. He was almost to his feet when he felt something crash into his head. It knocked him out cold, and probably for a good amount of time. Because when he woke up, he's somewhere dark. It was suffocating. All Richie could think is that he was going to die here. He was unable to move his arms or legs. 

He was going to die here. 

  
  


\--

The only way Richie had to tell what time it was through the small cracks in whatever container he was trapped in. It smelled so horrible, Richie had thrown up at least twice. The second time was mostly bile. He had been there for three days, from what he could tell when the light would shine obnoxiously in his face and then slowly disappear. 

He was gonna die here, and it was all his fault. 

Richie allowed his head to slump against the wall. Wondering if he just stopped breathing. If it would take the disgusting smell away. 

\--

"Yeah, when is Trashmouth going to get here?" Eddie voiced his wonders aloud, this caused the table to stop and look at him. Their expressions grief stricken. 

"Eddie, Richie died back in 1991." Mike spoke slowly, as to not frighten Eddie. Eddie looked at him, eyes widening. Tears threatening to spill from his eyes. 

They all looked sad now. The giggly, happy mood of the group had been shattered. Stan looked the most distraught. A sob ribbing from his throat as he covered his face. 

"What? What happened." Eddie's face felt hot, tears coming to his own eyes. He looked over at Stanley who was currently being comforted by Ben. 

"Patrick Hockstetter, he kidnapped and killed Richie. Stan was the one to find him." Mike spoke, sounding like he had no connection to this. However they could all see he was about to cry. Eddie shook his head.

"No, No! Guys!" 

"We're sorry E-E-Euh-Eddie. We would have told you, I didn't even remember. R-Richie hasn't crossed my mind in years. Now it h-huh-hurts, just like when I first found out. It h-urts like it did with g-guh-Georgie" Bill spoke, voice soft. 

"Oh my god, Richie." 

"He fought it." Stan said softly. Now uncovering his face. "He fought Patrick so hard. You could see it. The day Richie went missing, Patrick was covered in bruises and his neck."

"Richie didn't go without a fight. Never did." The mood of the group was shattered, but a new one was building. They all exchanged different stories of the Tozier boy. 

\-- 

  
  


The damned clubhouse was still a death trap, even worse than before. That makes sense though. Eddie's not sure what possessed him to stick his hand down a small crack in the floorboards and reach for a small rubber ball lost many years ago, due to the fact that he was a little shit growing up. However, when he pulled it up a rush of memories came back. 

_ "Not what? Not be awesome and have fun and celebrate the magic of the paddddddddleballlll?"  _

_ "Okay Richie you're ten minute are up."  _

_ "I can see your vagina."  _

He smiled softly at the, placing it in Ben's hand as he watched the other resume their old positions in the clubhouse. He supposed he should too, but he wouldn't. The hammock would probably fall, creating a cave in. Which they all could die in. Also, for the simple fact that it just didn't feel right without Richie. 

_ "I'll do anything to get the hell out of Derry."  _

He never did get to, did he? 

They were all talking about collecting tokens, when suddenly. A can rolled off the shelf and hit Stan's feet. Cautiously, Stan picked it up. Ignoring the shouts of protest when opened it up. Inside there was shower-caps, Stan had made them wear when they were in the clubhouse so spiders wouldn't get stuck in their hair. 

_ "Stanley, we're not afraid of fucking spiders."  _

_ "I stand corrected."  _

"Thanks Richie." Stan spoke softly. Taking on and shoving it in his pocket. 

"I have mine, I guess." 

\--

Eddie stormed up the stairs. They couldn't do this without Richie. That was for sure. Mike had them all out, by themselves, for god sakes. Collecting these stupid ass tokens. While collecting his, he had been attacked. And he was pissed.

"Hey, it's Mike Hanlon. Why don't you come on back to Derry!" He complained to no one in particular. Splashing water into his face. He continued to mumble to himself. "You know, your best friend is dead, that doesn't matter, we're gonna act like he doesn't exist. 

When he looked back up, Henry Bowers was standing right there. Even if he had reactions like a cat. He would have never been fast enough to stop the knife that slashed his face. 

It stuck in his cheek and it burned like a son of a bitch. 

"It's your time Eddie." 

"My time?" He asked, laughing nervously, looking at the curtain, it was moving, in a way that couldn't be blamed on wind. It moved to part so Eddie could get it. If Eddie had been paying more attention, he would have realized this. 

\--


	2. How this thing was suppose to begin, but I'm an angsty mess, so I made you suffer.)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So this is the very beginning that I didn't feel like worked, so I got rid of the idea. But, I really want to show that I haven't given up this work, I just have been writing and rewriting and nothing is turning out. So, I hope you enjoy, and this is not yet complete either.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, let me know what you think,.

\--

Eddie Kaspbrak wasn't sure why he was in the junkyard, well he knew why. He was looking for Richie. It was why he decided to look here that confused him. Richie had ran away many, many times before. They never found him here. Then again, he doesn't think that Richie ran away again. He would always come back the second day, it had been about 5 day now. However he had woken up in a cold sweat this morning, two words screaming over and over again in his mind. 

"Richie, Junkyard, Richie, Junkyard." 

So here he was, backpack filled to the brim with medical supplies. Eddie jumped as there was a small crackle from the walkie talkie at his hip. Bill and Richie had made many fixes to them and they would now be able to hear each from across town. 

"A-a-any l-luh-luck?" Bill's voice came through, his stuttering was so much worse now. Richie was his first childhood friend and losing him would be awful. 

"Nothing yet, Big Bill. I'm looking. You at the quarry yet?"

"Yeah, Stan's at the well house on Neibolt Street, Bev's at the arcade. She met someone who's willing to help, but we'll have to wait until it's time to meet up to talk more to him." 

"Alright, I'm going to go look now. Over." 

Eddie had a theory, but he wasn't going to tell Bill. If Bill had found out, he would get himself killed. His theory was Patrick, the day that Richie had gone missing. Patrick looked like a wreck. He had a black eye, bruises the shape of a fist. However, what Eddie couldn't get over was his neck. There were so many red scratches covering him. Scabs at certain points made it look like someone had dug his nails into the flesh of his neck. 

Eddie wandered through the junkyard, calling Richie's name over and over. When he reached the middle, there was an old and musty couch. There was also a rusty fridge, it seemed to call Eddie's name. He could smell it from here and started to gag. He was able to control himself though. 

Eddie quickly made his way to the fridge. He took a few deep breaths before opening it. He took in a sharp breath. 

"Richie?" No response, Eddie's hands quickly flew to his walkie talkie, because there was his friend's seemingly dead body in that fridge. Eddie ripped the walkie talkie from it's spot in his fanny pack and quickly pressed the 'call' button. "Billy! I found him! Holy shit! I found him!" 

"E-euh-Eddie t-thats auh-awesome g-get his stuh-stu-stupid ass back!" 

"Billy?" Eddie pulled Richie out of the fridge, cursing when the taller boy slipped out of his grasp. 

"Yeah?" 

"I don't want to say this, I don't wanna give up hope, but I think he might be dead." Bill's breathing became harsh as he begged him not to say that. He could hear the leader of that pack begin to cry. 

"I-I be r-right o-o-o-over. Duh-don't let him go. Y-yuh-you hear me, Eddie? Oh-Over." Eddie nodded, just dropping the walkie talkies, he got a good look at Richie's crumpled frame on the ground. His hands and feet were bound and his mouth gagged. There was a bit of dried blood dripping down the side of his head. After checking for a pulse and when he found one. Eddie quickly untied them all on set about putting cream on his rope burns. He wasn't sure what else he could do. Then he checked his head. There was a large wound that he could do much with other than pour some rubbing alcohol into it. 

'What happened to you Richie?' 

\-- 

Richie wasn't dead, he just could have responded if he wanted. He just didn't want to. His eyes weren't opened either. He didn't react when his head smacked off the ground, due to Eddie not being able to handle his lanky frame. He heard several apologies, a large string of swear words, followed by more apologies. 

If Eddie had thought to apologize, he wouldn't think he's dead, right? Wrong, as he was proven when Eddie told someone, who he guessed was Bill, by the use of the nickname 'Billy' that he thought he was dead. 

Richie wanted to let him know that he wasn't dead. However he was just so tired, and the thought of moving was really unbearable right now. He almost hissed when Eddie poured rubbing onto his wound. However, he couldn't even find the will to do that. 

"Hang on, please Richie. I just need you to hang on for me. Bill is going to be here soon. We're going to get you to the hospital. You'll be fine" 

He'll be fine. 

\--

Eddie gagged at the sight of Richie's head. His black hair was matted to his scalpe in some places. Due to the dried blood. It was scabbed over, but still disgusting looking. Eddie used a cleaning pad on it. Which split it open again In some places. All the while Richie lay limp. Not once moving. Except for the movements of his chest. Eddie had wrapped his head up and put everything back into the backpack. 

"Richie, hey. I don't know what to do now, Bill should be here soon. I don't know what's taking so long. He should be here." Eddie said, pulling the others head into his lap and looking in the spot that the wrap wasn't covering.

Rchie however had different plans as he began twitching in his sleep. Face contorting like he was in pain, before his eyes snapped open. His pupils diluting slightly before he snapped them close again. 

"Oh god, ow." His voice sounded like an old woman who had been smoking for many years. That's when Eddie got the idea of what to do next. Food and water. Not very much, since they didn't want to hurt the other's stomach. 

Eddie quickly grabbed his backpack, and then took the little fanny pack attached to it. Inside were crackers and peanut butter. Some water, and aspirin. 

"Richie! Hey, do you want some food? I got crackers." The other didn't answer, just went back to being completely still, it was kind of gross to see. Eddie gagged before prying Richie's mouth open and taking a capful of water and pouring it in his mouth. 

"Eddie? Eddie! Are you in here?" Eddie smiled as he heard the voice. He had been working side-by-side with the man since Richie's disappearance. 

"Yes Mr.Tozier!" Suddenly, from far away. The voices of his friends called out to him. He didn't move, just looked at Richie and started crying. Hash tears rolling down his face. 

"We'll be okay, right Richie? Your dad here. Well be okay." This got him a smile. 

Eddie smiled as Wentworth and Bill came into view, followed by Ben, Bev, Mike, Stan, and some other kid. Eddie hadn't had a chance to meet him. 

Wentworth was rushing over, picking him up and wrapping him around his body so Richie's head laid on his shoulder. Richie's hands hung down at his sides but his fingers twitched at his side. 

"Holy shit, Richie! Buddy what   
it happened?" Richie just groaned, letting out a small, 'Patrick'

Eddie fucking knew it.

\--

They had gotten Richie to the hospital, he was awake, but so doped up on pain meds he was just kind of giggling at his machines beeping next to him. Then he would realize why he was here and just start crying. 

"Hey, baby." His mom rubbed his forehead. Richie looked over at his mom. Her concerned face sent into a fit of giggles. If she knew why he had gotten attacked, she would hate him. "Your friends are here. That Eddie boy refuses to go home. Stan won't go either, his dad is so pissed." 

"Can I see?" His mom chuckled, kissing his forehead. Knowing he meant his friends. 

"Turn your head baby." 

Richie did, and he swore he had seen an angel. Eddie was over him, his forehead wrinkled in concern. He was also gripping onto Richie's hand like it was a lifeline. Stan wasn't there, Richie could guess he wasn't far off. 

"Holy shit, I think I've died and somehow gone to heaven. Looking, good spaghetti man. Where's Stanny?"

"Richie! Don't joke about dying! You really could have!" Richie's mom was leaning over him, putting a hand on his shoulder. Telling Eddie that it would be okay. 

"I'm sorry, mommy." Her eyes were back down on Richie.

"For what baby? You have nothing to be sorry for" 

"I-I can't say, I provoked Patrick."

"Baby, no matter what. You didn't deserve to be locked in a fridge." 

"Yeah huh, mommy." Richie said, flinching at the hand that was brought to his cheek. His mom quickly pulled back. 

"Eddie, sweetie. Why don't you leave for a minute?" Eddie looked like he wanted to argue but the look Maggie sent him was enough for him to put his hands up and slowly back out the room. 

\-- 

Maggie was exhausted, and so was her husband. First, thinking that Richie had run away. Then, when he didn't come home after the second day, it was obvious that something happened. The third day was spent searching for him, with those kids. 

They had found him, after two days, and now that she had her baby back. He had confessed that he liked boys, and was in love with that Eddie boy. Not that she cared, she would love her kid no matter what. However, he had just the worst freaking timing. Now he was balling his eyes out as he held onto her. She was pretty sure the drugs were making him more emotional than usual. 

"Richie, baby. Don't cry." 

"I hate this mom, I hate it so much." 

"Kiddo, come on. I still love you" Richie's dad just had a hold of his hand, looking at his kid. 

"I want Stanley." Maggie nodded, gesturing for her husband to go get him. He looked at Richie sadly before leaving the room. 

"Baby, do you mean what you said? About Edwar- Eddie?" Richie just nodded, jerking his head towards the door when it opened. There stood Stanley. Stanley let out a few tears when he saw the state Richie was in. He had sat in the cab of the pickup truck brought Richie here. Forcing everyone, including Eddie to sit in the bed. He held on to him tight. 

It was clear that Stanley cared deeply for their boy, they were best friends. They had been through thick and thin together. Stan had been weirdly quiet and emotional since Richie's disappearance, it was clear Stan wouldn't be back to his snarky, mean self until Richie was back in working order. 

"Stanny! Come here!" Stan was by his side in an instant, even going so far as to climb into bed with Richie. Allowing Richie to spoon him. 

Maggie stepped back, telling the boys she would be back in a moment. That she was going to get some water and update Richie's friends on the situation. Richie just nodded. So did Stan. Stan had his hands over top Richie's.

"Come on Wentworth." 

\-- 

Eddie was tired of being left out. First he was kicked out of the room, which he could partially understand. Then Stan got invited into Richie's room and not him. That he didn't get all, Stan was always just an asshole to him. He couldn't stand him, and now he was being invited into his room with Richie. Not Richie's best friend. 

Eddie didn't mean to be selfish, of course Stan cared about Richie. They were all best friends, he was just extremely worried. 

He nearly knocked over Maggie, when she came out. He instantly bombarded her with questions. 

"Is Richie okay? We were talking and we think we know what happened. However we don't want you to be mad at any of us for not saying something earlier. How's Stan? He's been acting weird. I'm so sorry we didn't find him- Oh." 

He was being hugged by Maggie, she was on the shorter side so it was comfortable. That was, until she started sobbing into Eddie's shoulder. Thanking him for finding her son. They stayed like that for a second, then Maggie quickly pulled away again. Eyes shiny with tears. 

"Okay, I'm okay. Listen boys, I haven't gotten much out of Richie. All I know is that Patrick Hockstetter did it. Do any of you know why he would do that?" Eddie found himself looking at the others. Ben looked slightly guilty, the boy picked at his hands. 

"Mrs.Tozier? I think I might know why. Richie made me swear not to say anything though." Ben looked at his friend group, expecting accusing gazes, however. Most of them were understanding. 

"What happened?" 

"I'm not sure, but when we were at the library together Richie was drawing at a table and-" A small glance at Eddie. "Can we talk alone?"

Eddie was left in the dark again. 

\--

Stanley wasn't surprised, because of course Richie was crushing on Eddie, that just made sense. What didn't make sense is how that related to, what was being dubbed as for now, 'The Patrick Incident'

**Author's Note:**

> Should I continue?


End file.
